PTSD: The cycle of trauma-based addiction 

Thomas Goenczi, Lookout contributor 

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With any pattern of behaviour, there is an identifiable cycle that propels one forward. Sometimes we are acutely aware of this pattern and other times we dwell in dense unconsciousness. Both are equally painful in their own right.

What makes addiction out of trauma difficult is that the mind begins to rationalize the necessity for the behaviour through its emotional reinforcement. In other words, addiction becomes an alluring alternative because all the other options cause us to confront our despair. By defaulting into our compulsiveness, we are pushing away the internal anguish of the trauma. What seems apparent is that there is a handing over of consciousness through the veil of complacent routine.

One of the first things we must do to interrupt a psychological pattern is to identify the cycle of addiction. Each cycle of addiction is nuanced and complex in its own right. However, there is usually a generalized formula that makes up the pattern of trauma-based addiction:

Overwhelm: this appears physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Physically, our bodies don’t feel aligned with reality, we notice our bodies tense up, and our breathing deviates from its natural rhythm. The common physical sensations of being overwhelmed include sweating, tension around the jaw, neck and shoulders, bouncing of legs, unable to sit still, and the classic pit in one’s stomach.

Emotionally, anxiety begins to well up, feelings of sadness and anger have a pulse to them, and our ability to regulate our emotions becomes non-existent.

Mentally, our thoughts begin to be ruminative, and we find ourselves following the same thread of thought. We have very little to no control in this overwhelmed state of mind, and our inner dialogue becomes overly critical and judgemental.

Escape: Due to the psychological immensity of the moment, we look to bypass this confrontation with ourselves. This could be due to being internally or externally triggered. When this happens we look to distract ourselves to avoid our suffering.

Action: This can be a conscious or unconscious act. We do the thing that gives us the relief we are seeking, that feeling of no longer needing to face the trauma and its subsequent consequences, an out. In a way, we are psychologically searching for an experience that tries to transcend the enduring horror. We are in pursuit of a psychic high that pulls out. These actions vary from substance abuse, overworking (workaholicism), sex and love, social media, phone usage, gaming, etc.

Deterioration: After the action and the menial gratification that comes from it, our psyche plummets into a deeper state of angst. Our attempt to repress or suppress causes our psychological well-being to become a more deflationary state. The high lifted us only to make the fall that much worse.

The trouble with trauma-based addiction is that sometimes we are conscious of the cycle and even its outcome, but other times we are flying unconsciously. However, when one can begin to associate their addiction to trauma, it gives us a starting point.

A traumatic event pulls a lot of psychic energy away from our ability to live. Addiction out of trauma occurs as a way to pull that energy into another direction; it is a pursuit of living a life we once had before our trauma. In a way, we are looking for a way to live that surpasses our trauma. Identifying where you are in the addiction cycle helps with gaining back some control in the moment. Of course, we would all like to be able to manage and cope better when we are in a state of overwhelm. However, the first step to combatting any addiction is witnessing our unique psychological patterns. When we become aware of how we get to the point of psychic deterioration, we bring a light to our compulsiveness. Once we know what the pattern is, then we can finally learn to accept it.

Thomas Goenczi is an RCN Veteran and MA Clinical Counsellor with Private Practice: Well Then Therapy.

The content is not intended to substitute professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your mental health professional or other qualified health provider with any questions regarding your condition.